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 Post subject: Pirate Parade will be much better
PostPosted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 12:08 pm 
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Pittsburgh sure loves parades. Local politicians have seen the positive economic impact of the recent Steeler and Penguin championship parades have provided for downtown Pittsburgh that they are now working on a third parade for the other pro sports team. The chances of the Pirates winning a championship are slim and none, and Slim left town. However, the Pirates are on the verge of a major accomplishment that no other major pro sports team has ever done. The Pirates will lose for the 17th season in a row. The Pirates and the City of Pittsburgh want to take advantage of this momentous occasion with yet another parade.

Pirate owner Bob Nutting and his staff may not have the best team in town, but they sure know how to market a lousy team. The self proclaimed “best management team in all of baseball, maybe all of sports” will know doubt have a superior parade compared to the previous romps through downtown.

Here is a sneak preview of the Pirate parade attractions:

Of course there will be the usual parade standards with horses, military representatives, politicians, players, owners and five or six marching bands. The Pirate Parrot and the Pierogi racers will there to entertain too. In keeping with their “Lets Go Green” program, all vehicles used will be run by alternative energy or fuels. There will also be floats…lots and lots of floats. The first float will be the bobble head float which will consist of all the little made in China dolls that have been purchased along with a game ticket though all the losing years.. That should be a site to see. Next will be the dog and cat float. Fans will enter a contest to see if their pet can qualify to ride on this float (must attend at least two Pirate games to qualify) Since winter will just around the corner, a promotional Ski float provided by 7 Springs Resort(owned by Mr Nutting)will be next in line. There will be three floats with retread music groups(Disco, Rock & Country represented) The tree hugger float will display all the recycling and biodegradable products at PNC Park. Next up will be the Latin America float with a steel drum band along with Latin ladies dancing with fruit hats. The last float will be the all you can eat float. If you don’t qualify to ride on this float,(must attend 3 or more games) there will be plenty of designated areas along the parade route that will provide this option. There will be caps, towels, shirts and other useless trinkets that will be tossed to parade viewers. Since the parade will be in the evening, by the end of the procession and speeches of how this feat was accomplished, what a better way to end the festivities than with a phenomenal display of fireworks! If you want to attend the parade but are ashamed to show your face, don’t worry, biodegradable paper sacks will be provided to put over your head!

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 Post subject: Re: Pirate Parade will be much better
PostPosted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 1:37 pm 
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Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2009 9:59 am
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I don't know what's funnier...the content of the post or the fact that somebody took the time to write it. :lol:


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 Post subject: Re: Pirate Parade will be much better
PostPosted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 3:58 pm 
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Posts: 7189
I say keep the $50 and ban him anyway...


Bet you cant wait til the start of Steelers training camp, Bullish

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I say keep the $50 and ban him anyway...

For those jumping ship, we'll keep the bandwagon warm for you...


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